excellence.

Oooh, I have quite the story tonight. Yes sir, this is one to go down in the history books.

Tonight was the much-awaited Canoe Club meet. Alan, Matt, Abby, and I had been planning on going. On our way there, we came up with the fun idea of me pretending I was British the entire night. I immediately became Molly from Kent. We then found the others and loaded up on the bus, with them laughing hysterically every time I said anything and especially when I would introduce myself.

Kayaking itself was incredible. We were in an indoor pool, so it was really crowded, but somehow I got my own boat and my own coach. So basically I became unbelievably skilled and awesome at kayaking. But seriously, my coach said it seemed to come very naturally to me. So there, Betheas!

It became a bit worrisome when my coach asked me where I was from, and I said Kent, and he called over another girl who was also from Kent. She asked me where I was from in Kent, which luckily Matt had prepared me for, and I responded Maidstone. I nearly threw up when she responded very enthusiastically with, "ME TOO!!!!" She then asked me what school I went to, which Matt had also prepared me for (he's a clever one, this Matt of mine), and so I responded with, "Seven Oaks." I couldn't remember if it was seven or nine though, so I kind of stuttered saying it, but luckily she didn't seem to notice. She then began proclaiming about how close to her house that was so I started pretending to not be able to hear her and then floated away. It was close, to say the least. It is a miracle I remembered all those random answers in the moment.

The real interesting part of this story comes in the form of a friend I made without meaning to. The other guy in my teaching group was a gay guy named Chris. Well, after the kayaking bit, we went to a pub. Because the English can't do anything without there being alcohol somehow involved. So at this pub (where I was wearing sweatpants with a wet butt from my bathing suit bottoms and just my bathing suit top with my jacket over it because I was not informed of the after hours pub bit of the plan), Chris comes to our table and decides me and him are best friends and proceeds to spend the rest of the night with us. He then asked for my full name to add me on facebook so I told him that my real name was Malia but I went by Molly because it was easier. Then he asked for my phone number so I told him I had just gotten a new phone and I didn't know the number yet and didn't have it with me. More close calls averted.

Then the best thing ever happened. At the pub, Matt decided to be risky and told Chris I had an amazing American accent. So they all demanded I do it, and I did - and then Chris begins to rant about how American accents grate on his nerves and just how horrible they are and so on. We were nearly hysterical. Then on the bus, I said something about an American girl who lived in our flat. Which then inspired Chris to begin a tirade about how unbelievable it is that the housing office would make us live with the likes of an American, and how being called an American is the worst possible insult, and when he found out "she" was from Georgia, he began nearly screaming about how Georgia is still racist and anyone from there is absolute trash. He said he had met a girl from California a few days ago and he assured her that it was okay, at least she wasn't from Georgia. He said that everyone in Georgia is lying on the ground all the time either from fainting in the Spirit or because they are black and were beaten up. I can't even explain how much we were laughing. I almost threw up and I couldn't even begin to breathe. Of course the boys were just egging him on agreeing with everything he said. I was past hysterics.

Anyways, he friended me on facebook and I chatted him and told him I was American and the boys had dared me to be British all night. I thought he might be mad, but he actually thought it was funny. He was also quite forgiving because he has a crush on Alan now! So I invited him to come out with us tomorrow night so he can be around Alan. I thought it was a nice way to make up for our rough start, yes?

I love lying. It makes life so much tastier.